- soothing wind blowing against my face
- gentle breeze giving the leaves a brusselling sound against each other
- the calming flow of water creates a slow current down the peaceful river
- the rough beat of motorcycles greatly argues against the cooling tides of the river
- contrasting the deep green leaf, a blue dragonfly rests patiently to explore Mother Nature
- the beauty of a clear, blue sky allows the many green shaded trees to rest and grow
- the rough shore of broken trees and shrubs portrays the unrepeatable ruffles of water down the river
- previously bloomed plants depict the naturalism of nature down the shoreline
- chirping birds, steady tides, blowing trees none of which sound or look the same anywhere else
- grass that pokes the skin while still soft to touch rhyme with the rhythm of the sea
Hey Lisa!
ReplyDeleteYour points are very descriptive, and it feels like we can specifically sense what is going through your mind at the moment. In the line "The beauty of a clear, blue sky allows the many green shaded trees to rest and grow", I like how you played with the colors. Keep up the good work! :)
Yo Bij,
ReplyDeleteI really like how your points make me feel.
You seemed to be paying attention to every little detail, and it makes me feel like you truly were very close with nature when you were describing your surroundings. The motorcycle line is my favorite and how it "argues" with nature is just a stupendously wonderful sense.
Keep it up!
Heyy Lisa! You made some really great descriptions. I really like how you use comparisons like with the dragonfly and with the motorcycles. I also really like how you contrast the rough shore line to the smooth river. Great job!
ReplyDeleteHi Lisa,
ReplyDeleteSome good observations here. Like Nicole, I liked the word "argue" to describe the contrast of the motorcycle engines with the tides (and the peacefulness of the scene in general). Did that word make it into your final poem? If not, maybe it should! Also, reading Hayley's comment I am wondering if you could somehow compare the buzzing a dragonfly makes with the sound of the bikes. Just a thought.
Cheers!
That dragonfly image is so lovely...
ReplyDeleteHey Lisa!
ReplyDeleteI really like your points. The descriptive words that you used really helped me to picture this beautiful nature scene (brusselling, calming, peaceful, unrepeatable...). I also liked the line where you talked about the trees, birds and tides, and how they didn't look or sound the same anywhere else. This really shows the uniqueness of nature.
Good job!